We have twenty-four hours in a day, and quite honestly that does not feel like enough for me lately. As I went on a walk with my daughter, earlier this afternoon, I prayed to know what I could do to have more time in my day. Essentially, I have been trying to figure out how to do all that I need to do, while taking care of my daughter at the same time. “How am I supposed to pray and study my scriptures, exercise, take care of Coraleen, and achieve what I strive to with my blog and speaking endeavors?” I asked. Who knew such a simple answer would come to me so clearly. “Play with her more.”
Now, I know to never doubt an answer received from Heavenly Father, but it seems like those are the kind of answers we receive when we want everything to work out in our favor, right? I mean, here I was trying to ask how I could basically stretch the twenty-four hour period farther, and the Lord tells me to use more of that time taking care of my daughter instead of doing all the other things I try to do in any given day. Well, after we got back from our walk, I practiced doing what He counseled. I played with her. As I did so, I realized how much joy she was experiencing. I noticed how much I had been missing out on as I had been expecting her to play with her cousins or toys as I tried to provide for her. The thing is that God knows exactly what her and I both need. He will provide. I may not have a husband helping me in the home, but I do have my Father. Coraleen does have two parents to take care of her – a mother and a Father. He will provide, and I need to trust in Him. It is not my role to try so hard to provide for her, that is why I chose to stay home and raise her, no matter what the circumstance. And He has been showing me that He can deliver.
I am excited to spend more time being her mother tomorrow – not her father.